10 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Turned 25 (Naija Edition)

INTRODUCTION: 25 — THE AGE THAT HITS DIFFERENT

There's something scary, confusing and slightly magical about being twenty-five. Somehow, you stop being a "youth-youth" but still don't quite become a "real adult"; there's that in-betweenish feeling. That space is comfortable in Naija.

Sense, money, vision, and soft skin with a clear mind; that's real-kay. But, real life doesn't really look like that, especially when NEPA, Nigeria, and societal pressure dey honey your uppercut from all angles.

At twenty-five, I looked back and shot: "Why didn't anyone tell me this?" It's time to get on it, though. So here I am, telling it now. Let's jump right into it.

1. No One Has It Figured Out — They Just Pretend Better

Even those people who look as if they have it all well? They figure things out on a daily basis. Most adults wing it. Some are just better at packaging. Some rich have depression as their gifts. Some broke lives give hope.

Do not compare your life to someone else's filtered highlight reel, and grow at your pace.

What I should have known: It's okay to not be okay. It's okay to stop. It's okay to pause and breathe.

2. Money Won't Solve All Your Problems — But It Will Solve Many

Money is worthless, but a lack of it makes you humble. Learn to earn, save, and invest early. Having a budget is not only for married uncles with Excel sheets.

But also? Don't allow that hustle culture to choke your joy. Eat, rest, drink water, gravitate to earth. Money is of great importance, but sanity in spending it is necessary.

What I should have known: Pursuing purposeless money is a trap. But having no money in Naija is a bigger trap.

3. Friendships Will Change — Don't Force What Is Fading

Changes in friendship dynamics. People metamorphose. Life gets busy. Priorities are changed. All friendships are seasonal, and that is just normal.

You would not talk to everyone every day. Let it glide on its own.

What I should have known: Friendship isn't constant presence, but mutual value- even in silence.

4. Your Parents Are Human Beings Too — And They Don't Have All the Answers

Your parents have tried their best. Sometimes failing. Sometimes projecting. Seeing beyond the title helped me heal.

What I should have known: Forgiveness does not entail excusing the hurt; it is allowing the self to move forward.

5. Romantic Love is Sweet…But It Is Not Enough

Love will not cure your brokenness. And vibes will not create a future. Attraction does not equal compatibility. Chemistry minus communication equals disaster. Begging for someone's effort in the relationship is emotional suicide.

What I should have known: Stop romanticizing struggle love. Choose peace over passion if you must.

6. Your Career is Not Your Identity, So Let Go With Sense

Jobs come and jobs go. Titles change. If your self-worth is rooted in your job, you are going to feel lost when life shakes the table.

Naija society pressures success=identity but to keep it real success is not linear.

What I should have known: You're allowed to quit things that no longer align-e.g. even if they once did. 

7. You Can't Heal in the Same Place That Hurt You _ Choose Your Environment Wisely

At 25, I detoxified my life. Stopped following people who made me doubt my worth. Left spaces that celebrated my silence more than my growth.

What I should have known: Peace is not passive. Sometimes it requires painful exits.

8. Therapy is Not a Shameful Thing-meant for Mental Health Wealth

Strong face is not strength. Therapy helped me understand myself. Prayer helps too. But talking out loud-greatly processing emotions from someone else-that's where it's at.

What I should've known: Strong people tear as well. Vulnerability is strength in disguise. 

9. Your Timeline Is Yours: Don't Let Society Pressure You into Panic 

Everyone has a different timeline. Delay is not denial. And having early success does not guarantee lifelong peace. 

What I should have known: Peace of mind > external achievements. 

10. It's Okay to Start Again. Again, and Again 

Reinventing oneself is not failing to start anew. Shed outmoded dreams. Breathe and allow yourself to aspire for new things. 

What I should have known: Transformation is messy, but truthful and pure change. 

IN CONCLUSION: 25 is but a stop, and not the destiny 

You're not supposed to have it all together during your twenties. In twenty's, you do not know what you want but instead pretty much find out what you do not want, test who you are, and slowly build the version of yourself that can survive and thrive. 

So breathe. You're doing pretty good. And even if you are not, there's still time. The road is still open. The text is still being written. 

YOUR TURN - LET'S HEAR IT! 

What is something YOU wish you knew before the age of 25? 

Post on the comments, or send DM to me on IG @Temisantony. 

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